I was seeing a guy for 4yrs we were very happy, didnt think hed cheat on me in million years, then he broke his back and ended up on strong pain killers, his back mended but he couldnt kick the drugs so went to detox for 9 days and started a new job requireing him to be away for 3 months at a time at sea, which was fine we had done that many times and wasnt an issue, he was away about a month and said he wasnt coping and was going to so stay with his dad for a while and sort himself out, that was fine, he needed it, he didnt see how we could be together at this time, a year later we got back intouch and i travelled to go see him and things were looking good i was there a couple weeks, we decided to see how things went and i went to stay with him after a week or so school holidays were due and he was going to spend a week with his kids as he always did and i stayed behind, he got a lift halfways down the country with some friends for cheaper travelling when arriving at his friends place in wellington he got dropped at his friends place for the night and his stuff still in car went on a ride with some guy for 4 days, long story short he was tracking his stuff down for 4 days, all the while partying it up with his mate and on the last night there sleeping with the woman that lives at the house he was staying, before getting his stuff back and going to see the kids, when he got back home he lost his job and ofcourse his work phone leaving him without a phone, so he gave her my number!! dont ask me why, aparently she was a mate, until she told me a few things that didnt add up so i called his bluff, he told me everything then confessed hed slept with someone while being away for work just before we broke up, said he was drunk both times and wasnt thinking. I tried to move past this, but he got a new phone and found he had seen this woman again but not slept with her ans she stole money from him, but theyd kept in contact, after that he promised to never contact her again and things were good for a month or so untill she txted him again asking for his birthday, i read the txts all about how she has ruined his chances of getting rid of me and how she hurt him blah blah when asked he said he wanted her to feel as though she had missed out on something good and wantd her to feel bad for what she had done (when stealing from him) she has txt only a couple times since in the last few months, he hasnt txted her back and i deleted the txts everytime and any trace of her phone number. Am I a total idiot? gullable? I so want to believe him...
Marriage & Divorce - 8 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
dump his ass
2 :
If I have learnt anything from glee, (1. people who call other people gay are covering up their own sexuality, and 2. once a cheater always a cheater, and something bad always happens, like you get mono, or pregnanat) then yes, once a cheater always a cheater, but I think it's different with every person x
3 :
Try some punctuation and leave him
4 :
Bad habits die hard.
5 :
what if the roles were the other way around.
6 :
Once a cheater always cheater.
7 :
The phrase "once a cheater, always a cheater" is a load of crap. People who cheat do so for different reasons. Sometimes, people find themselves in really bad situations, or they find themselves going through tough emotional times, and they just make bad choices. That's part of what makes us human. Now, just because a person finds him or herself in a tough spot, doesn't make the mistake okay. Yes, a mistake is made and even though it's a human mistake to make, it doesn't make it hurt any less. This man hurt you. No matter how sorry he may truly be, and no matter how much he says he will never do it again, it's his task to prove to you that he is worthy of re-earning your trust. Notice what I said there, re-earning your trust. He should know that you're not going to just automatically trust him right off the bat, he has to know he has his work cut out for him. In order to accomplish earning your trust back he needs to make solid efforts. One, he needs to show that he's making strides to not fall back into the dark parts that led him to cheating in the first place. Two, he needs to prove that he has left this other woman in his past.
8 :
Yeah, that saying is true. There's no excuse for cheating. Even if the person is drunk, it doesn't matter. If the person really didn't want to, they wouldn't cheat. If my gf flirted with another guy with no intention of actually doing anything, I would break up with her in a heartbeat.
